Big Mind

Last night, while sitting, I had sort of a strange experience. I started to feel like my mind was not seperate from the object around me. Though I was sitting in a room full of junk, I felt like as a whole it was "us" rather than me in a room of junk. Then it occured to me that Jonny was showering, and doing laundry, and I felt really close to her too. It felt like we were one mind sharing all these objects, and able to observe it from our individual bodies. It felt very good, and the 15 minutes went by, not only unnoticed, but way too fast. I did not want to stop when the bell went off. I think I could have easily went another 10-15 minutes.
I suppose I should not strive for that feeling, or become too attached to it. I read somewhere that you will sometimes experience feelings that seem like out of body experiences, or visions, or vivid fantasies, but not to buy into them. They are just manifestations of who knows what. Nonetheless, it was a very good feeling. =)

Bird Killer Strikes Again! Pigeons on high...alert.

Killed a pigeon today. Kinda had to. It couldn't find it's way back down the stairs and it was shitting all over everything in our Flight Ops office. I whacked him with a piece of metal that was laying around. I had to hit it two more times to finally kill it, but I tried to make it quick. Poor guy.
Excel quit on me at work. That's why I'm taking the time to write this. Can't do anything I need to at the moment. Really sleepy today too, that's not helping. Was going to do PT, then they said just go to the gym on your own. Went to the gym and could not park there, so I didn't even want to see what it was like on the inside. Drove back to Battalion and showered. Oh well...the day's not starting off very good, but maybe I'll get something done by this afternoon.

Nuthin

I've been pretty good about meditating lately. I find myself thinking about work a lot. I guess that's because of the amount of time I spend at work. I mean...even when I'm at home I think about work quite a bit--do I need to look something up, what's the uniform/time for tomorrow, am I flying on such & such a day etc. If my mind has to conjure up some thoughts they're likely going to be related to work.
Brad Warner mentioned that thinking "non-thought" is kind of like focusing on the spaces between cohearent thoughts. I'm paraphrasing, but that's the idea. So I've been using that a little bit. On occasion I can hover on that gap between thoughts for quite a while. I notice that it's a relaxing feeling and time goes by quickly when it's like that.

2010

So it's a new year again. Maybe I can post more than once or twice this year.
Did you see this...
http://www.hulu.com/watch/118886/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart-the-temple-of-hume
Gotta love the daily show. =)
Trying again to meditate every day at least a little. I've also decided to totally give up alcohol. I don't care about rum cake & things like that, but drinking alcohol. It's just not worth the trouble. I mean...it's not worth ANY trouble at all, so what's the point ya know? It costs a lot, it makes me sick after even a small amount, I no longer enjoy being buzzed--let alone being drunk, it causes trouble and possibly huge trouble that could end a career a marriage or whatever...what else? Hell why do you need more reasons than that right? So yeah, I'm done drinking.
I still have my coffee though. ;) Maybe next year.