I didn't go to the zen center this morning. I even went to bed early to try to get a decent night of sleep so I could wake up at 8. Still, I guess 0200 isn't that early is it. Plus, I got up at 0500 to help with the breast milk pumping thing. Oh well. I still sat 25 minutes this morning like usual. Maybe next week.
I've been reading a book of collected writings from D. T. Suzuki. He talks a lot about satori, or enlightenment. I think in Soto it is sort of not talked about, or not tried for. I think Suzuki may be of the Renzai school? I'm not sure. Gotta read up on that. Not that it makes much difference I guess. I don't really have a teacher, and I only loosely identify w/ the Soto tradition. I was thinking of working with a koan, but I don't know if that would be a waste of time. I'm not really sure "how" you do koan work. I was reading this and it got me thinking of trying it by myself. I hate to change anything though. I kind of like what I'm doing already.
Ella has been doing well. She's almost off of the CPAP breathing machine. Once she's on the Vapotherm I think we'll be going to the level 2 side soon! Wahoo! They're even talking about giving her a bath pretty soon. Her first bath! How exciting. She is awesome.
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